eeveehow, searching the truth

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It’s been one month I never go back to ipoh, kinda miss home
so I decided to go back after the irritating hematology exam. At the same time,
I received Jeng Yi’s message, telling me that our juniors managed to enter
final of debate competition. Hooray…
that’s great! Our school has not been entering debate final since 3 years ago,
besides we lost at that very day, to the same school some more… Hey juniors, it’s
time to grab back the champion title for the school!

The final was held in Sunday morning, so I had to purposely
wake up early to give my moral support to them. However, I got the chance to
meet all my good, old friends (that’s the only good thing). Then I talked to
the juniors, gave them my best wishes. But I wasn’t that close with them
because I had ‘abandoned’ the debate team since 2 years ago. Hey guys, I am
very sorry…I have my own reasons. Anyway, one of them was sobbing because he
felt very stress and nervous, the rest looked emotionless. This reminded me 3
years ago when I was in their position. Palpitation was the only thing I could
remember at that moment. But it was full of fun, me and my friends always like
to talk all the memories that we had in debate. The most important thing is, we
never cry and laugh all the way even when it was very stressful.

Then the competition started. The opponent had very good
preparation, the speech was fantastic and their debaters had good public
speaking skill. However, our juniors were very awesome as well, they rebutted
without mercy. Jeng Yi sat next to me, told me how hard for them to prepare
this competition. Actually they have
been changing the whole strategy over and over throughout the week, my friend
even consulted our super seniors in Singapore because the topic was too hard.
At last, their final strategy was so superb that I knew they are going to win
in the middle of competition. So I spent most of the time chatting with Jeng
Yi. The reason I think the juniors are going to win because their rebuttal
skills are so good, until the opponents don’t dare to answer all the questions
directly. Before the result was out, I left that place and assured my friends that
they would be the champion.

Mana tau.. after a few hours later, Wei Li called me and
said our junior had lost. I thought he was kidding because it was so obvious
that the opponents were very weak, even my brother who was from the opponents’
school feels embarrassed after watching the competition with me. Wei Li said it was because of some bastard
judges’ opinion. Then Jeng Yi messaged me later, told me that for the first
time, he cried for debate. I know he has been putting a lot of effort in
training up all these juniors, this means so much to him, but in the end, they
lost because of some judges’ unwise opinion. From what I heard, that particular
judge said the opponent had more reasonable points, even though they cannot
rebut as good as our juniors. Can you
imagine a debate team, which hold their points firmly and rebut continuously
and successfully, lost in the end, how could it possible? I don’t understand…. If
debate were all about voicing up points without defend it, then might as well
convert debate competition to public speaking competition.

To all my beloved juniors and friends, who involved in this
competition, you all are INCREDIBLE! In debate, the journey is more important
than the destination. Peace!

            I had one week of holidays, as usual, I wasted a lot of time doing nothing instead of studying. Whatever….. But this holiday had given me a very special and unforgettable memory, which is meeting up with one of my old friend.

 This friend of mine is very hard to be described. I don’t really get to know him as he seldom visit me or send his regard to me. But I know he is always around me, or even try to approach me whenever it is possible. He is cruel and heartless. I dare to say, he is a failure, because I have never been seeing him face-to-face for quite some time, till I forget when our last contact was.

             Until last Monday, I finally met up with him. It’s almost  9pm  already. His first greeting was so vague, till I didn’t notice his presence so I continued enjoying my time with my family. Then he got angry and sent second greeting, which was more obvious. He emptied my stomach and created a lot of gas within. (Oops, I forget to introduce his name, his name is sickness!) Later, I felt like vomiting, but I refused to do so. Therefore I went to my bed and hoped sleeping could get rid of this friend. Actually I didn’t feel sick, but I felt angry and furious, because I am going to Bukit Tinggi with my family the next day. Maybe this idiot knew it and purposely came and infected me at this very moment.

 My plan didn’t work. I didn’t sleep well. My sister came in and put a pail beside my bed just in case I want to vomit. After awhile, I couldn’t stand it anymore, I went to the toilet and vomit. Oh gosh, it was really terrible, my delicious dinner and my precious chocolate were pouring out from my big orifices in my face (well, definitely not from my ear). I hate that feeling, so torturing! I can feel that all my internal organs were squeezing and all my GI tracts were turned upside down. Feel like dying….

 Then I felt better after vomiting. However the cozy feeling didn’t last longer. I vomited again in the next hour. The first thing came to my mind was, would I experience hypotension or hypertension? I am so happy that my mind still working even though I fall sick. Back to my question, my body is loosing fluid, so it should be hypotension as volume goes down. But because of my lost fluid, the heart should beat faster in order to maintain the circulation. I don’t know the answer, any smart people please drop an answer in the comment.  

 Around 2am in the morning, it got worsen thus my mum
sent me to a clinic. The clinic has a Malay doctor, in his 40s, looked
quite energetic even though it was already midnight.He never built a good rapport with me, didn’t ask how to greet me…..basically he failed our Sem 1 BS exam. He tested my body temperature, orally, then gave me a jap in my buttock. At first I was trying to relax so that he could do it fast and nicely. But once he poked the needle inside, my whole gluteus maximus contracted and I felt a sharp pain. I was so worried that it hit the nerve, guess it didn’t because my leg hasn’t paralyze. Then my sister asked what caused this to happen, the doctor said it was due to a virus called Norovirus. FYI, it is also known as Norwalk agent, subgenus of calicivirus, which caused epidemic gastroenteritis. How could this happen to me?

              Frankly
speaking, I almost forget the feeling of falling sick. I dare to say
that I maintain a healthy lifestyle, proper diet and adequate exercise.
Emotionally wise, I have good distress hobbies and normal
interrelationship. Basically I met all the requirement of WHO’s
definition in order to claim being healthy. I can’t believe I would be
defeated by this Norovirus. Hopefully it’s not a latent infection. I
really cannot stand the torment one more time.

 Luckily
my family didn’t cancel the trip to Bukit Tinggi. Though the place is
pretty boring, it is indeed a good place for recovery. I was having
tough time the first day, dizzy all the time. But I did enjoy on the
second day. Increased appetite, energetic, able to smile in front of
camera….       

            After the visit of this old friend, I have learned how to appreciate being healthy.

First day in Bukit Tinggi, accompanied not only by my beloved family but also the idiotic illness.

                                 Second day was better, at least i got the strength to hold a rabbit

    It’s been a long while i didn’t update my blog. Here i am, posting another passsage, with misery and doubts.
    As a late 19 year old teenager, i am steeping into another perspective of life. Many things need to be done before i say goodbye to teenage, for instance maturity(definitely not physical maturity). Then the question arises, how to define maturity. In my own opinion, a mature(yah, mentally) man will never admit that he is mature. In another word, those who always declare being very mature actually are so not mature. You might not agree to what i am saying now, but think of it….
    So what is maturity anyway? In dictionary, it says: fully grown in body and mind. Body will reach its growth limit after puberty, but how about mind? And that’s the question for us to ponder.
    Because of my core thought for maturity, i start behave a little bit childish. Those who don’t know me well can confirm this with my good friends. But i enjoy doing so, not for the lime light but for my own guideline to be a grown-up. Children, the most innocent member in this complex society, know nothing but true affections. No pressure, no rivalry, no hidden thoughts and no worries. I am so longing for this kind of life, but it can only come in dreams. Wouldn’t it be nice if we handle problem like a child does?

If we can’t stand the pressure, just play hide and seek with friends to distress, better than taking drugs.
If we hate someone, just say: "i don’t want to friend you anymore", better than backstabbing at people’s back.
If we need attention, just cry out loud, better than doing all kinds of vague movement.

Except for the irresponsible part of children, i think growing up in this way might be very interesting. Who would like to join me?

    Everybody has different interpretation for maturity. Some says the ability to handle life routine, or the ability to handle complex relationships. For me, maturity is a process. There is no final destination but we can go as furthest as we can. In this process, various methods are applicable depending on personal preference.
    I am still worrying, whether i can survive in this competitive world. I am not well prepared yet, for my future life as i need sufficient maturity to guide my way. I need to gain more experience, hopefully not through failing(especially in exams).

    FOR MATURITY!

Yeah right? Elders told us to be honest, teachers asked us not to lie, so that we could gain trustworthy from the others. Seriously, who has benefited from being honest? Criminals get punishment after confession; awkwardness occurred after we ‘honestly’ criticize our friends’ weaknesses; bad impression filled the mind after we exposed our hidden identity. Till now, who still insists to be honest?

          No doubt we could know the real fact after people telling the truth, every human is a curios creature, don’t you? What’s making truth such a valuable substance, which everybody longing to seek? Let’s flash back to the prehistoric time, when we ancestors thought they possessed the true knowledge. From Bohr to JJ Thompson, the atomic structure’s concept has been refined for so many times, nobody dares to assure which concept is the ultimate truth. Even though we have a proper, more reliable concept for atoms now, but as a science student, or rather a civilian, we need to put doubt on every piece of knowledge, which assumed to be true. That’s the positive way of learning!

            Back to the previous subject, since the ‘truth’ we know now may not be ‘truth’ in the future, why are we still bothering to know the damned truth?  Just forget it!

            What would you do if you somehow know a truth, which you refuse to know? Sadly it occurs many times in our lives. Some people will accept it, with an unwillingly heart; some people choose to ignore it, without giving any damn; some people will avoid it, as if they are still living with dumbness. A good friend of mine teaches me this proverb: ‘Silence is golden, Ignorant is bliss’. Well, this proverb suits the situation above nicely!

            The government or politicians that we vote for, surprisingly is the group of people who has the least honesty among other occupations. The reason is that they are smart in hiding the truth and creating stories (which we can understand) so that the community gets comforted. Unfortunately nobody appreciates it. On the other hand, we give 100% confidence to the doctors, who always full of bombastic craps (which we can’t understand), and only be seen if some tragedy happened. Yet, they are known as the most honest people. It seems that everybody prefers to be dumb, right? It is just that we didn’t realize.

            Truth, are you still looking for it? Yes, I am. Though I hate truth, I enjoy the process, or rather the journey of searching for it, like Robert Langdon did. Never regret.

I never met a real wild boar or black-coloured pig in my past life until i come to this forest. It is really amazing until i wish to take a camera shot on them.

Part 1:

Wild Boar is a very famous in the forest because he is the leader that chosen by the entire forest’ community. The community wants a leader who can fight for their rights and benefits from the forest, stand up for them when they are bullied by the forest. Before the election, Wild Boar set up many convincing manifestos and promise to fulfill them. Therefore, he managed to grab most of the animals’ heart,thus he becomes the leader that he always dreams of…….

Part 2:

Blackie(the black pig) is an ordinary occupant in the forest. But he refuses to continue such normal life, he wants to be different. He admires the wild boar which can be the leader of community, therefore he always waiting for opportunity….Finally he knows where to go….By end of this year, the forest will have an annual dinner where most of the animals will attend. Hence Blackie decides to join the organizing squad…

[ I saw this 2 different incidents at different time and different places, and i never thought that this two main character will meet together.]

Part 3:

Blackie works so hard in the organizing squad because he want to earn a post where he can satisfies his controlling desire. Unfortunately, the head of the squad has decided not to choose any leader among the volunteers. He feels very sad and depress…but he never gives up and always hunts for another opportunity. He even dare to grab his colleague’s job……

One day, the wild boar comes to the squad’s normal meeting. Blackie is so happy that he thinks he can change the situation by gathering the strength from both of them. Surprisingly wild boar agrees to help him. Therefore Blackie and wild boar discuss how to launch a series of revolution….

[ I don't know what is their plan, but what i see some phenomenons after the boar-pig fusion ]

1. The head of squad is scolded by the mother nature

2. The preparation progression is slowing down

3. Selection of Best Eater almost has to be cancelled

What do this phenomenons tell us? What are they going to do? What will be happening on the Dinner? Any heroes will come to save this situation?

To be continue………………………

                                     Director: Hoho                         "I wanna be inside your

                                     Producer: Hoho                        heaven, take me to

                                   Sound system: Hoho                   place you cry for,

                                       Light: Hoho                            where the storm blows

                                     Costume: Hoho                         your way……"

                                       Music: Bo Bice

                                   ALL RIGHT RESERVER